why?
by xXbleedingXheartzxX
Summary: sesshomaru cheats on kagome...what happens? is he to late? are theyver gonna be together again? plz R&R!
1. gone

**_Why…_**

**_Why did you leave me?_**

I lay here thinking how this could be. We had dated for 4 yrs and you proposed to me on our _**4th anniversary**_. You used to be so cold but I melted that cold barrier you had around your heart. You started smiling and laughing….

I thought my life couldn't have been better….you were the one and I knew it. Like when you would hold me close to you and we would gaze upon the stars. You told me I was the one; I was the woman you wanted to marry.

A year later we got married it was the happiest day of my life…but it soon fell apart…our marriage fell to pieces…I knew this was the end.

On our _**2nd **_wedding anniversary……I told you to be home by 6 you said that was fine….I had set up a romantic diner. I had candles, the food the roses everything. B-b-but you never showed up. An hour later I cleaned up the roses. I put the food away, and everything else I had put out for us. I slipped out of my silk black dress that I bought for the occasion. I went to bed crying…..I have cried more times than I can count. Over the past year you have been so distant. Coming home late, never being around….nothing.

"**_WHY!!!! WHY THE FUCK DID YOU DO THIS TO ME!!!! WHY ME *SOB*!!!!"_** I shouted as I cry. I curl up into a ball under the blankets in _**our**_ bed. I cried myself to sleep.

You came home late I heard you it was 3 in the morning. I looked at you as you climbed in bed. You saw me and tensed….I just stared at you I looked at you coldly and said I don't care anymore. And turned facing the wall and fell asleep. Knowing you was watching me.

The next day I awoke and you were gone once again.

I quickly ran to the bathroom and threw up; I was pregnant and have been for the last month….we were drunk when it happen, not that you would care anyways.

I packed up my clothes after I took a shower, I was wearing some shorts with some black converses with a red and black studded belt, with a red shirt and a black sweater. By three o'clock I had my stuff in a u-haul truck with the help of some friends and had them drop my things off at my _**new**_ house.

I looked at the house once more before I left….and leaving a letter and ….._**DIVORCE **_papers behind. Also put the key under the mat for you to find.

_**XXXXXXXXXLEAVEING YOUXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX**_

_**Sesshomaru's pov**_

I knew you knew about my affairs….

You proved that to me last night…..how….how could this happen?

How could I hurt you this way?

Why did I ……*sigh* I don't know

I left for work early thinking you needed to calm down. I bought you your favorite flowers to make up for last night.

How could I forget that was _**our anniversary**_?!

Or your_** birthday**_ ….how could I miss it all!?

'**_DAMNIT!!! WHAT THE HELL IS WRONG WITH ME?!_**'I shouted in my mind.

At around 3 I kept getting this feeling something bad was going to happen, but I ignored

It thinking it was something unimportant.

……that's until…..

Around 4 I left to go home. When I got there I saw that all the lights were off, I seemed

Odd because usually they were on….when a thought popped into my head.

NO!!!!!!!!!!

She couldn't have….. I ran inside and looked everywhere you were nowhere to be seen.

I looked in our room and saw the papers…..my heart shattered.

They were divorce papers.

There was a letter too….

Dear sesshomaru, (what_** happen to my nicknames?)**_

I'm sorry to say….well not really but anyways as you can see I left.

I'm not coming back. _**(Not come back**_

I can't deal with this heart break anymore. This is just too much to handle. You cheated on me….I know. _**(I'm sorry)**_

I'm not stupid it was obvious I …I just didn't want to believe it. Ha-ha I guess you could call me a fool but _**(no you aren't a fool I was the fool)**_

I will no longer be the fool. I must move on, this is the end….goodbye._** (No please don't end this)**_

I howled in pain.

I have finally lost the one I truly ever have loved…..and I don't even know where she is……my love.

_********* 4 yrs later*********_

It's been 4 yrs since I left you…..I have been fine.

I have been a single mother.

I have given birth to a beautiful boy.

His name is Sikaru Takashi I thought that he should have your last name

Even though you are a jackass….*sigh* I heard you got married.

I'm…I'm…happy for you.

I'm glad she gives you the happiness I could never give you.

Sikaru is beautiful….he has you silver hair, with my blue eyes. He so tall and big.

He reminds me of you but he isn't as cold as you ha-ha

_**Sesshomaru pov**_

*sigh*

It's been 4 years,

I hope your happy ….I remarried.

I was forced though, because we had to merge businesses.

……………..I'm walking down to the park right now to remember the day I proposed to you.

***sigh*** I lay down looking at the stars remembering when It was you and me and how we would lay here together,

If only…..I hadn't made that stupid mistake….

I miss you…..

You were my missing piece ….you fit me perfectly…._**I love you**_…..I miss you…..come back…..


	2. found out

_**kagomesz pov**_

_wow sesshomaru its been so long since the divorce_

_i still miss you after all you put me through. _

_Sikaru is getting big now, i have made it as a writer i have had a book published_

_on our life together....maybe you have seen it...._

_sikaru is starting kindergarten soon....i wish he knew you so he could have a father...but _

_i guess sometimes things happen for a reason...._

_i took him to our spot yesterday it looked as beautiful as the day you proposed _

_i cant believe i still love you..._

_i wonder if you ever got my letter about Sikaru telling you that you had _

_a son...._

these are the thoughts that cloud my mind every second of the day....

_**sesshom****aru pov**_

_i read your book the other day...._

_it brought back many memories or the go and bad._

_This woman i must call my wife is a nuisance, she has been acting strange...why?_

_she had gotten something in the mail that made her ....this way..._

_i miss you so much......i saw you in a magazine today....you were with a little boy?_

_is that your son? did you move on? is he mine?_

These thoughts haunt me through the night

" _**SESSHOMARU" **my father was yelling again this was going to be a looong day,_

_**5 hours later .....10:00pm**_

_i walked through my house it was quite....shockingly...._

_i walked up to my bed room and changed...and i saw **her** the thing i called a wife sleeping_

_i went to the kitchen to get a drink.....choices were between a martini or vodka.....vodka it is...._

_when a envelope caught my site it was on the kitchen table....the one that made **her** freak out...._

_i picked it up...._

_it was..._

_addressed to me....and it was from....my love....kagome..._

_i was shocked and it was dated 4 yrs ago.....it had been sent to many places because i kept moving and traveling_

_and finally got to my home....._

_ i opened it....well it was already opened but anyways...i opened it and took the paper out there was also a small envelope in there _

_too but i decided to read the note fist:_

_ **Dear Sesshomaru,**_

_** by now i have been brave enough to send this to you....well while we were together and you were .....seeing other**_

_**women i was to afraid to tell you this....but i was pregnant...**_

_**you may not believe me but one night you came home drunk and we had sex...**_

_**i was going to finally tell you the news on our anniversary but....you never showed up....**_

_**so i was fed up with it all.....and i left**_

_**besides you are doing better without me now....as soon as i left you basically got remarried**_

_**haha ironic how they say that if you truly love someone that you will let them go....but they never said**_

_**how much it would hurt.**_

_** but i guess in the end of it all i made the right decision...you r happier now right? :)**_

_**well anyways this isn't about us....its about our son..... yes hes a boy i named him sikaru takashi....yes he has your last name**_

_**hes adorable.....**_

_**well you probably don't care...*sigh* but i thought you have a right to know your son**_

_**.....and NOOO i don't want your money or anything....**_

_**sincerely,**_

_** kagome  
**_

_**p.s here are some pictures.....enjoy....**_

_ i took the pictures out to see my son.....he was beautiful i had never seen a baby like him..._

_he had my hair and eyes and his mothers nose and mouth...he was just beautiful...._

_but then the moment was interrupted.....when i remembered_

_that this was sent **4 years ago ALMOST 5 now,** and this wench i call a wife kept it from me!!!_

_ My eyes turned red....and the game began....this bitch is leaving and my mate....my love....nd MY son is comming HOME!_


	3. goodbye Wench!

_** SESSHOMARU'S POV**_

_I stormed up stairs my eyes bleeding** red** i was beyond **pissed **this woman....**.no!** _

_This wench had made her way into** MY** life and thought that **SHE** had the right to to keep this from me!!!_

_My own son! she didn't want me to know about!  
As i stormed up stairs i knocked things down that she bought that was useless i made it to my bed room door and **FLUNG** it open_

_she sat up lyke lightening....she looked at me and glared _

_" **Sesshomaru what the hell are you fucking Doing this late in the goddamn evening"** she shouted she may be obsessed with _

_me but she loves her sleep.....she started rambling somemore_

_my patience was wearing thin....i walked toward her she must have noticed my eyes were red and i was coming_

_ after her because she shut that annoying little mouth of hers.  
she kept walking backwors and kept stumbling too.  
when i cornered her...i could smell the fear on her.__i put my face close toword hers as she looked away i graved her face " **LOOK AT ME YOU WENCH**" I shouted harshly and her eyes snapped_

_open and looked at me  
_

_It was silent....my beast was furious!  
"** what the fuck is this**" i said in a calm deadly voice as i showed her the envelope he face went pale..._

_she started to stutter "**t-t-that i-is a l-letter -f-f-from -"** i cut her off by graving her neck and holding her up against the wall _

_my beat was in control "** WHY THE HELL DID YOU KEEP THIS FROM ME!?!?! THIS IS ABOUT MY SON?!?!!? THE ONE I JUST FOUND OUT ABOUT! **_

_**AND ABOUT THE WOMAN I LOVE! YOU WORTHLESS WENCH YOU DIDN'T HAVE THE FUCKING RIGHT! " MY** beast shouted as he flung her across the room_

_She stood up and looked at me with a cold look and narrowed her eyes in my direction...._

_" I did it because i love you!!! i always wanted you! you were supposed to be **MINE** dammit! she had everything! in high school she was what everyone wanted to be!  
and you were mine not hers, then she came along and stole you from me! she then married you you guys ha everything! **SHE** had everything that belongs to me!!! and now she has your kid that was supposed to be **OURS**." she sneered i looked at her with distaste and hate and i walked to her_

_" have you ever thought why she was the one? well i will tell you! she isn't a gold digger like you. she actually is smart, she doesn't get jealous!_

_ she is there when i need her. everything isnt always her! she is kind, she isnt a bitch! the list goes on! and let meh reassure you!_

_that you will **NEVER** be like her! **NEVER**"i shouted as i swung my hand an smacked her she grabbed her face in pain._

_**" now never come back here again! and if you do i swear on my life that i will make sure that you will never breath again!"** i whispered harshly _

_And deadly she nodded and wiped the tears on her face and left.....but before she left i stopped her_

_" **oh wench one more thing be for you go** " my beast said as my eyes flickered gold and red she turned around with home in her eyes_

_" **the court date for the divorce is going to be this week so be prepared to sign the papers because i will be damned if i stay married to you**" i said harshly and she left....._

_ **i was exhausted...an i collapsed on the bed**_


	4. Spanish Guitar

**_kagomes pov_**

_i lay in bed tonight listening to this song that i used to listen to in high school when i used to see you at a cafe i used to always go to....._

_the name of the song is Spanish guitar by Toni Braxton *chuckle*_

_this song had always reminded me of you because, you would sit in that cafe and play that Spanish guitar of yours....i used to wish i was the one in your arms.  
i had always imagined what it was like to be in your arms....safe....protected....loved_

**_A smoky room, a small cafe They come to hear you play_**

**_ And drink and dance the night away _**

**_I sit out in the crowd _**

**_And close my eyes_**

**_ Dream you're mine _**

**_But you don't know_**

**_ You don't even know that_**

**_ I am there_**

_.....i remember the day i first saw you, i was sitting out in the crowd, i had closed my eyes hoping you would notice me....but you never did._

**_I wish that I was in your arms _**

**_Like that Spanish guitar_**

**_ And you would play me through the night _**

**_'Till the dawn I wish you'd hold me in your arms_**

**_ Like that Spanish guitar _**

**_All night long, all night long I'd be your song, _**

**_I'd be your song_**

_i always wished i could replace the guitar that was held in your arms with me.... and hold me all night whisphering sweet things to me_

**_Steal my heart with every note you play_**

**_ I pray you'll look my way_**

**_ And hold me to your heart someday _**

**_I long to be the one that you caress with tenderness _**

**_And you don't know You don't even know that I exist_**

_the more i went to see you i had found my self falling more and more in love with you you held my heart in your hands.._

_but you didn't even know that....._

_but i remember wishing that one day you would realize it..._

**_I wish that I was in your arms _**

**_Like that Spanish guitar And you would play me through the night_**

**_ 'Till the dawn I wish you'd hold me in your arms Like that Spanish guitar_**

**_ All night long, all night long I'd be your song, I'd be your song_**

_i remember the first time you saw me....you looked at me while playing...our eyes locked with one another as i swayed to the sound of your music..._

**_Te sientas entre la gente Cierras tu ojos Y suenas que soy tuyo_**

**_ Pero yo no siquiera se que estas ahi _**

**_Me gustaria tenerte entre mis brazos amor _**

**_ ( translation :You sit between people Close your eyes And dreams that _**

**_I'm yours But I do not even know you're there I would love to have my arms)_**

_i would close my eyes and imagine you holding me close to your heart just as you did with that guitar)_

**_I sit out in the crowd _**

**_And close my eyes _**

**_Dream you're mine _**

**_And you don't know _**

**_You don't even know that I exist_**

_i would wish i was yours and you were mine.....but you never knew i was there you never knew how i felt....i was nothing_

**_I wish that I was in your arms_**

**_ Like that Spanish guitar_**

**_ And you would play me through the night _**

**_'Till the dawn I wish you'd hold me in your arms_**

**_ Like that Spanish guitar All night long, all night long I'd be your song, I'd be your song_**

_ .....i used to go home ever night wishing i would be yours and you were mine...._

_but then one day we finally met it was at that same cafe you said you noticed me there...._

_and how i came every day to listen to him play.  
and from that day on.....we fell.....we were in love....in such a passionate love that no one could replace....or so i thought..._

**_................................._**

_i lay in bed now singing the words wishing i could change time so i could warn my self of the heartache i would face in the future.... the tears roll down my face as i go every memory that we had together....when i thought we were in love.  
i lay in this bed as my heart brakes more and more....wishing i could be in your arms safe and loved again.  
why did it end this way?_

**_my heart longs for you!_**

**_I'm dying eachday a little more without your love.....when will you hold me in your arms like that spanish guitar?_**


End file.
